I am still not well at all and sad, and not much inclined to write about
various topics. Besides, I have been busily occupied on the other forum,
that still is being surrected. There's a little bit more on it in the
As I have been repeating this quite a few times now, here follows a small
clarification. By "not well at all" I mean in particular that I feel
drained and exhausted, mostly. I just can do very little and also don't
feel up to much.
And by "sad" I don't mean depressed, which I can say quite
confidently because I now quite well
what that is, from my own experience, but rather
What happens around ME is the old often repeated
story of human excellence being destroyed by human stupidity,
indifference and malice - the "Butterfly On The Wheel" theme, that in
fact was best treated by
in Dutch, in Idee
Here is my translation of that idea, that is in the
form of a parable:
A butterfly flew high, high in the air. She
enjoyed her freedom, her beauty, and most of all she enjoyed the
contemplation of everything that was under her.
- Come, come here... high! she seemed to call
out to her sisters who flitted far beneath her above the flowers of
- We drink honey, and stay below.
- O dear sisters, if only you knew how
delicious it is to overview everything! Come, come!
- Are there flowers above, from which we can
suck the honey, that we butterflies need to survive?
- One sees from here all the
flowers, and that joy...
- Do you have honey up there?
It was true, up there there was no honey.
The poor butterfly that felt unhappy living
below, became fatigued...
Yet she tried to remain above! It was so
beautiful, she thought, to survey everything, to understand all in
But honey... honey? No, there was no honey up
And she became weak, the poor butterfly! Her
wingbeat got slower, and slower. And she declined and surveyed less
Yet she wanted...
No, to no avail. She declined...
Ah, there you come, her sisters called out,
what did we tell you? Now you come to suck honey llike us from the
flowers down below. We knew it!
Thus cried the sisters, who enjoyed being
right, although they were right only because they lacked the beauty
- Come, and suck honey like we do!
- And the butterfly came lower and lower...
and still wanted...
There was shrub with flowers.. would she be
able to reach it?
She no longer flew lower... she fell! She
fell next to the shrub, on a road, in the track...
And there she was crushed by an ass.
Translation of part of my Dutch note to this - and the links that
follow require Dutch:
Another parable, reader! About highmindedness that comes to fall,
about the fate of exceptional human beings, about the comforts and
rewards of being lowly, about why those who can see further than the
average so often have are cruelly punished, and about greed for honey
Later in life M. regularly referred with bitterness to this IDEA,
in which he described himself in the first place but also (see
who is only being spoken of in IDEAS
P.S. And the new forum? It's in the process of being born.
I think it is likely that after it has been opened (that still may take
some time, and rightly so, for quite a few of the flaws of Phoenix Rising
can be prevented by starting from good foundations and rules with good
people, who also have learned from their experiences, and don't want to
make the same mistake twice) it will soon take over much of the role and
membership of Phoenix Rising, although it is possible both will remain
And on Phoenix Rising - now with ads hanging around the poor beastie's
neck - there is a rather curious discussion about it, that gets
'curiouser and curiouser' under the title
Where has everyone gone? Why is this site so empty? (yes, it's a
link, with food for thought) that's also interesting on various levels
and from various points of view (psychologically, rhetorically,
logically, morally, humanly...), but that's just for the record for the
It is a bit eerie, and I think I have mentioned
the Stanford Prisoners Experiment
before in this context. It's not a happy sight, what's happening on
Phoenix Rising on the moment, especially on that thread
Where has everyone gone? Why is this site so empty? but
this too often happened in human history, and the
Stanford Prisoners Experiment
show some of the human-all-too-human reason clearly.